Wake and funeral...........part 3

The funeral itself was very different from anything I have ever done.

We started at the farm and walked with the body to the church and then to the cemetery. This was no small feat......it took 4 hours!

The men carried his casket on their shoulders the WHOLE way! I was so afraid they were going to drop it at first as they were trying to get their rhythm down and get used to it.

There were 150 - 200 people or so. A truck went first with the big flower arrangement wreaths they use here and then some of the people and the men carrying his body. Another group of people followed as well as a mariachi band and a "Mexican oompah band" (as we like to call them.) Then there were the horses........

He was a charro, which is basically a cowboy. There's a riding association he helped found. So, 14 horses and riders came to participate in the funeral. They also had the man's own horse walked by his only son. It was empty, no rider, but had his hat hanging off of the saddle. That was sad. It followed directly behind his casket the whole time.

At the end of his road, before we got onto the main road, they had a little ceremony for the riders to all honor him. We stopped and they said a few words. Then they called out the names of each rider, he would yell "present" and then ride his horse up to the casket to salute. It was moving. His son walked his horse up to "say goodbye". The family really had a hard time with that. Very sad.

Then we began the walk. We first walked to our street and took him and his horse to his old house where his wife lives and they raised their children. At her doorway, the wife sprinkled his casket with "holy water" (in a Coca Cola bottle) by using some white carnations dipped in the water. Then we headed back to the church. It took an hour to get to the church. They had a mass and then we left the church and began the walk to the cemetery. Wow...........you should have seen where we had to walk. It was pure hills. The cemetery was at the top of a very high hill. It's close to our home, but there is a hill so steep you can not even walk up it. (remember, we live in the mountains)

So, we had to talk the long way. We wound through hills and streets for a long time. It was uphill the whole way. I felt so badly for the men carrying the casket. It took us over an hour to get there. At the cemetery it took another hour and a half or so to bury him.

You are your own gravedigger here. The family did everything. The grave was prepared before we got there, but the family mixed the cement and everything. After they finally put his casket in, they poured the cement and then put all of the flowers on top. They did not fill it with any dirt on top. They just left the cement.

The mariachi band and the other band took turns playing the whole 4 hours--- except for during the mass. The horses and their riders were all lined up at the cemetery. It was really a neat tribute. But the family...........I can honestly say I don't think I've ever seen anyone grieve so deeply. 2 of the daughters were so distraught. One passed out and the other almost did. They were so weak and had to be carried along by friends the whole day. It was very sad.

There's more, but I won't bore you with the details. It was just really sad to sit in some of it, walk with the people for hours and think, "We're the only Believers here."

When the son brought John home at 5:30 a.m. he told him that he noticed John was the only one not drinking and drunk and he really respected that. His little girl is Faith's best friend. Please pray we can continue to minister to this family and show them the love of Jesus. It breaks our hearts to know there is so much tradition and ritual, yet no real hope.

That evening they started the days of prayer. The priest comes to the house 2 hours a day to lead them in the rosary and prayers and lighting candles for his soul. Then the mom was telling John on Sunday that now they have a 40-day period where someone MUST stay at his farm constantly and they MUST NOT shut the door or his soul will not find rest. It's really sad.

Wake and funeral............part 2

The thing that really struck me as I observed the wake was the difference in who was serving and who was grieving.  It made me really think about how we do it back home.  We reach out to those who are grieving and try to comfort them.  We make meals, run errands, or do whatever small gesture we can to serve them.  At least, that's how my experience has always been in the Christian community.  But this was different.  There was no one to comfort them.  No one to really help.  Everyone just sat in chairs in the barn and watched the family do everything.  They went out and bought ice and sodas, cup, cookies and other things to pass around.  They kept coming by with trays of cookies and drinks for everyone.  I think part of it was just to keep them busy.  They kept leaving to pick people up or to go get more supplies.  It's just how it is here, so I'm not saying it was a bad thing.  Just contrasting the difference.

It made me think.........we comfort and serve out of love.  How can you do that if you don't know TRUE love?  If you don't know Christ as your Savior?    There was no comfort or hope.  It was really sad.  It made me think of some of the Bible passages about death and the family and friends mourning and the preparations for their guests.  I pictured it in my mind to be very similar.

Before we left for John to bring me home, the mom/wife asked John if he would pray for them when he got back.  He had many opportunities to share his faith that night.  It was also sad though because as the night went on, they began coming around with cigarettes and trays of beer and whisky for the guests.  John said there were about 150 people there during the night.  By 1 a.m. or so, they were all drunk.  Sad.  He did have some interesting conversations.............and you can imagine how much more so as the night went on.  LOL

One of the the things they did was to continually have 4 people stand at the 4 corners of his casket.  Later, around 1:30 or 2 a.m., they had only 1 person.  The idea was that they were standing with him so he wouldn't have to make the long walk into eternity alone.

It was really a very interesting experience, but it also broke our hearts for some of the tradition and hopelessness.   There was no assurance of anything and no comfort for the family.  The daughters were very upset.  They actually passed out at the funeral.  I'll describe that next............

Wake........and funeral part 1

I wish I could really describe this so that you could completely visualize it in your mind...............  I'll just have to share a little and hope you get a glimpse of our experience.

Our street is all one family.  They own all of the houses.  The owners of the house we live in are the daughter and son-in-law of the main couple who started out with this land.  The mom still lives here, but she and the dad have been separated for years and years, so he lives down the road a little on their farm land.  Well, he died last week on his 63rd birthday.

He had been in the hospital for 2 weeks in a city about 5 hours from here.  They brought him home finally the night before he died.  He arrived around 1 a.m. and then spiked a fever of 40* Celcius and died at 6 a.m.

Custom here is to go and sit with the family until the funeral, which takes place somewhere around 24 hours later.  His was the next afternoon.  John and I went over that afternoon/evening to sit with them and visit for a while and then I came home to stay with the kids.  John went back and stayed with them all night.  They brought him home at 5:30 a.m. and he took a little nap and a shower and then we went back for the funeral service and burial.

I don't even know how to describe it.................

I think it was honestly the saddest funeral I've ever been to.  I've been to funerals in Brasil and the States and John has been to some in Costa Rica.  But the family was so upset and it just had such a "heavy", "hopeless" feeling.  

We got to his farm and it was extremely simple.  We're talking a barn for cows, a concrete floor and a roof with several "rooms" divided out that were open areas.  A curtain hanging over a tiny closet-sized space for the bathroom.  I'm not sure if it was a real toilet inside (I don't think so) or a bucket or what....  We sat among the chickens, the grandkids went around gathering eggs, and everyone just watched the family walk around and cry and serve us.

The man was buried in his mariachi outfit.  He was a cowboy........more on that later.  They had a lot of flowers and candles all around the casket and also had incense burning the whole time.  His casket was very different---- the top part lifted, but then there was a glass window-like part you had to look through.  I'm not sure if it was for smell or what.   Many of the funerals I've been to is just just a body with mosquito netting over it and quarters or something over the eyes to keep them down.  Flies swarming everywhere.  It wasn't like that this time, so I was surprised.

I'll write part 2 so it's not so long.............

You know you're an MK when........................

You know you're an MK when..................

your cat brings in ANOTHER live bird to kill and eat in front of you and instead of getting grossed out, you run and get the Peterson Field Guide to Mexican Birds and try to identify it while you can still tell what it looks like.....................


Yes, I am SERIOUS!!!!!
That is a true story of our night tonight. LOL

And you know who it was of course---- Faith!
She is so "into" animals and critters and all that stuff.
The other day she wanted the bird Mia had just killed so she could disect it.
John threw it away.

I told her she needs to be a veterinarian.

wake and funeral

Please pray for John. He is sitting with our neighbors all night long for the wake of their father and husband. He died early this morning on his 63rd birthday. He had a stroke or it was an aneurysm or something like that about 2 weeks ago and has been in the hospital about 5 hours from here since then. The ambulance brought him back to the clinic here in our town around 1 a.m. this morning. He spiked a fever of 40* Celsius and then died around 6 a.m. I came home after stopping by the wake for a while earlier this afternoon and evening so I could be here with the kids tonight.

It was very sad. I'll write a description of it tomorrow.

As we were leaving so John could bring me home, his wife asked John if he would pray with/for the family when he got back there. I'm praying he will have an opportunity to really minister to them this evening and share his faith.

The funeral will be tomorrow and then they will have the novenas. The priest will come for 9 days and they will say the rosary and light candles for him. They will do it again on the anniversary of his death.

It's so sad and there is no hope in their mourning.
more tomorrow.................

Surprise, it's me again!

So, how did almost 2 weeks fly by this time??????
I'm almost embarrassed to even write this story to summarize my time since the last post. It seems like it's the same song and dance, but I'll tell it anyway. Then I can move on to other things........

It seems Miss Mia the Wonder Cat is pretty good at her "job". I've decided to call her the Wonder Cat for 2 reasons. One, it's amazing how much she catches. Two, I always WONDER what she's going to bring in next and when!!! She keeps me on pins and needles and a little jumpy.

I'm beginning to wonder if I should just start a blog for Mia? lol

She has been super busy catching stuff. I guess it's good. Well, it would be if she didn't bring it inside!!!! The day or 2 days after my last post (I've already forgotten which day) I went downstairs to run before everyone else woke up. I went in and put my shoes in the office and left the room for a minute. When I went back, I saw Mia was grabbing at the curtains. She never bothers anything. That should have been my first clue. Like a big goofball, I asked her what she was doing and walked over towards where she was. (what was I thinking????) Right when I got near her, she throws a mouse about a foot into the air. Right in front of me.

I screamed soooooooooo loudly and ran upstairs to wake poor John up so he would get it. I was trembling. Let's just say I did NOT run that morning. I knew it was gonna be a bad day..... it wasn't starting out so well.

Later we were doing school. Ummm, starting at 10 a.m. -----aghhhhhhhh! So, guess what the Wonder Cat did then? I was standing in the dining room by the table helping the kids and Levi said, "Dead mouse!" I panicked and got all weak feeling. I looked down and Mia was right next to my feet with a big, fat, LIVE mouse in her mouth. The backside and tail were hanging out. This time I had company---- Ike screamed with me and we both ran upstairs. Yep, big brave one isn't he???? (he's gonna get me for admitting that. lol) He was right next to her on the other side.

So, John had to come down again and try to get her to let go of the mouse and get it outside. I'm not exactly sure how he did it. But, it was alive and it turned into a big drama!!!! It was cat and dog and mouse outside. The dog wanted the mouse. The cat wanted the mouse. The dog had the mouse. The cat still wanted the mouse. The dog ran circles around the yard. The cat chased the dog. Mouse got loose......Eventually things calmed down and we tried to do more school. We didn't get much done that day. I was too spooked!

The next day, Miss Wonder Cat jumped through the open window with a LIVE BIRD in her mouth. She decided to teach the kids how to kill and eat. Right in front of us. Nessy got intersted, so she finally took it outside again. Then Faith stood at the window and gave us play-by-play commentary on "the kill". Gross! Poor John-------- I called him in to clean up bird feathers that time.

It's been wild.
This morning, NESSY (the Schnauzer) brought in a LIVE mouse while the cat was up napping in a box. (she loves to nap in things) The bad thing about Nessy is that I AM her favorite person, so you know where she'll come with her gifts! We were doing school and the boys spotted it. She was whacking it and playing with it. I screamed and the kids yelled and she got very nervous and depressed because she thought she was in trouble. Guess who I called to come get it??? Yep, my knight in shining armor again. John. Poor guy. He's probably thinking his #1 job is critter duty now.

I hope there's no drama tomorrow. I'm not finding the humor in it like John does. : )

MIC.......KEY....... ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

ok, let me back up a week.
it's been a week since I wrote again.
busy, busy, busy.

I can sum the week up in one word: MICE

I can't believe I even typed that horrible word.
John is laughing so hard about it and I just don't really think it's the slightest bit funny..........

So, back a few days.......
Levi woke up Monday morning to a nice little surprise.
Mia ("Miss Kitty Cat") decided to throw a little superbowl party Sunday night apparently.
The only problem----- she ate her guest!
Oh, and did I mention where???? Yep, in LEVI'S bed again!!! While he was sleeping in it!
aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Let's just say the poor boy is a little freaked about going to bed now. (ME TOO)
Miss Kitty is kind of spooking us all out.

(if you remember, last week she had a mouse on the floor by his bed and bird feathers all in his bed where she ate a bird while he slept)

This time, Ike was going to clean it up. He didn't make it. He threw up in the process.
Hey, he's a grown boy, he can clean the puke up himself afterwards..... I wasn't going in that room!!! The proof of her little party was a bloody mouse head with neck bones hanging out of it ON Levi's pillow! (man, poor guy!)


So, now fast forward to last night...........................
I was in the kitchen cleaning the stove and this is what I heard:

aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mia has a MOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I did what any respectable woman of 38 would do..... I climbed up onto the kitchen counter and closed my eyes really tighty and put my hands over my ears. (hey....... I have no shame, I'd do it again.....)

so, I have 5 kids screaming "There's a mouse!" and John telling me to get down (while he's laughing!) and it's pandemonium in the living room. They're chasing the cat who has the mouse. The mouse gets loose and begins to run around. I begin to cry..............

So, now it's even wilder and John doesn't know if he wants to laugh or get frustrated at the room full of scared kids and a very freaked-out wife. Somehow he manages to get the mouse out of the house and they are all talking at the same time and telling me all about it. I ask John if he killed it. He said, "NO" and I asked why in the world would he put a live mouse outside so it can come back in?????

I was seriously feeling a little light-headed and weak at that point.

And then....................

Faith let the dog out.
Guess who got the mouse? Yep, Nessy the Schnauzer. They're actually bred to catch those things. aghhhh!
Guess what Nessy did?
She brought the mouse back in!!!!
And put it on the sofa to play with it! (Nessy loves the sofa)

So, now the kids are screaming again, I'm back on the counter in the same position trying to figure out how to make a run for the stairs to go to my room and hide.
The mouse gets loose.
More screaming................
OH NO!!!!!!
The mouse goes inside of my sofa!!!!

I take my chances and sprint upstairs and get on my bed (for the night!).
I call John on his cell phone and ask if he got it. He said "NO" and said he wasn't worried about it. "it's little and the dog and cat will get it eventually". I hung up because I thought he was crazy................. So he did NOTHING about it for like 1/2 an hour.

Talk about getting stressful for me............
Finally, I hear more screams. Seems that the mouse came out.
John did finally get it and threw it out again. This time I think it was dead.

I was sooooooooooo stressed that I ate about 8 miniature, dark chocolate candy bars. (and this is the 'no sugar' woman) I got sick too.

So, it turns out there was another mouse in the yard so now John had 2 to 'dispose' of.

This morning the cat wanted in. I went to the window to look out first. I am not letting her bring in another one. And Nessy wanted out to go to the bathroom. Well, she ended up going on the floor because guess what the cat had????? Another mouse! A BIG one!
I had to wake up John so he could go get it so the dog could go out.

I had nightmares last night about mice. Alfie jumped up onto my bed and rubbed against me. I felt something furry and started screaming that the cat had a mouse next to me.

I am seriously stressed.
Calgon, do what you do best......................